Ex and dancing shoe

I ended my blog at friendster. Too many people that are close to me were reading it and I felt a bit contrived to express myself. It has become so tiring lately. I got together with my ex again and we started to go steady again and I did the whole announcing to close friends that we are back together and all that you do when you're supposed to be together.

The first month was great. No fights. A lot of talk and well a lot of love making. And then the second month came and there were so many issued. Girls he used to go out with. Guys I used to go out with. Confessions which up till now I deemed to be unnecessary. I feel like ending it again for the millionth time. I just felt so lost with the whole relationship all of a sudden and I have no clue as to why I feel that way. I tried again to talk to him and emailed him but to no avail. He shuts me out and makes me feel even more lost than ever.

This is why I guess I am unable to commit fully with him. It's the things that he does and says that drives me up the wall. Even now. I also feel very limited to express myself and to do things with him and to him. It is his nature that is now totally putting me off. I hate this. But I guess I really at this point of time want to end it. It makes more sense to do so. I'm not happy. And I guess all I really wanted was to live and love a little. Nothing fantastic. Nothing heart breaking. Maybe I should learn to do this the right way. The break up.

Right now I jus wanna put on my dancing shoes and dance....